My child may never...

Isis stepped onto the school bus today with butterflies in her tummy and an air of confidence.  There's something about 2nd grade.  Her clothes.  Her supplies.  Her long hair clipped back not looking so cute anymore.  She just seems like a big kid suddenly. She knows precisely where she is going and what is expected once she gets there.  She knows who to ask for help and she knows to help any little kid who looks lost.  She's done this all before.  She's got it.

This summer I came to the realization that Isis is happier in school.  In some ways this is good because, well, she spends a lot of time there.  In some ways it makes me sad because I want her to love being home with me and spending time on the farm doing things that aren't presented to her, arranged for her, or taught to her. It's no secret that I send her to school to learn.  But it isn't the SOLS, the math, the science, the reading, or the technology that I care about.

I noticed at both her kindergarten and first grade conferences that her teachers were very eager to share her test scores with me.  Very good, very nice, I thought. But can she play? Can she pick up a toy with no instructions and create with it?  What does she do when another child tries to join her?  What does she do if she is pushed? Is she helpful? Is she kind? Is she thoughtful? Does she recognize when other kids are sad? Can she sacrifice her own desires to help out a friend?  Unfortunately those skills aren't on the standardized tests.

Yesterday I met a mom who is sending her first child off to kindergarten.  The school where the child is attending has implemented a fine arts curriculum throughout the entire school.  I think this is an educational  step in the right direction for once.  The mom explained to me that while the concept is nice, it isn't going to get her child a job.  Her hope was that her child could attend a school with a language immersion program so her child could learn Spanish and have a better chance at getting a job one day.  I shook my head in fake agreement and threw up in my mouth.  I am not trying to pass judgement, but good grief lady let the little guy pee his pants once and learn the color rojo before you try to enlist him in the Julliard School of Suck.

Here's my point.  My child may never be get straight A's and that's just fine with me.  She may never get Student of the Month and that's ok with me too.  She may never get into any gifted program, prep school, elite choir, study abroad, or land a top notch job out of college.  Heck, dare I say that college doesn't even have to be an option? I dare say it because I went for five years and don't have a job and Chris dropped out and runs a successful business supporting our family.  I'm sorry, I'm so sick of schools and parents who have an outcome in mind of never leaving any child behind.  Well I can say that it is perfectly fine with me if my children get left behind and have to learn the skill of resourcefulness.  Isis already has no plans to marry and wants to spend her adult life living in an apartment with Eliza.  I'm pretty sure no advanced math class can prepare you for adult spinster sisterhood.

This afternoon Isis will hop off the bus with her homework folder and excitedly do it.  She will tell me all about her day and what is coming tomorrow.  But the nights will come where the work is hard or her mood is too tired or her brain is mush.  And I will close that homework folder and say Let's do this another time.  Tonight I will make some popcorn and beat your pants in UNO.  And tomorrow, you have your teacher call me if this is a problem.